Friday | September 10, 2010
MOST EMAILED
CAUGHT ON FILM
Julia Roberts Box Office
Julia Roberts contemplates her station in life in the classic "bathroom scene" from the upcoming film, "Eat Sleep Poop"
FROM THE VAULT
September 01, 2008
Bush Personally Removes Every New Orleans Resident HimselfBush Personally Removes Every New Orleans Resident Himself
Fake Advertisement
HOLLYWOOD
Creationists, Scientists Team Up To Protest 'Ice Age'
Creationists, Scientists Team Up To Protest 'Ice Age'
Much to the satisfaction of all protestors, one scene involving the Flintstones ended up on the cutting room floor.

HOLLYWOOD (CAP) - In what is shaping up to be an unusual alliance, several prominent scientists and creationists have banded together to protest the new 20th Century Fox/Blue Sky Studios release, Ice Age: Dawn Of The Dinosaurs.

"To include dinosaurs in a movie set 10,000 years ago, more than 25 million years after their extinction, is irresponsible from a scientific point of view," said renowned paleontologist Dr. Martin Sherman of Pennsylvania State University, during a demonstration outside the 20th Century Fox studios in Century City, Calif.

"Especially when dinosaurs are actually only about 4,500 years old," added Dr. John Warner, a noted creationist formerly of Eastern Kentucky University.

"Um ... We don't quite agree about that part," said Dr. Sherman, sheepishly.

The two camps had apparently planned separate peaceful demonstrations to protest the film's release, but wound up joining together when they both showed up on the same corner. And despite some initial conflicts, the two usually disparate groups blended quite well, according to those on the scene.

"At first I just assumed they would be closed-minded simpletons, but they're actually fine people," said Sherman of the creationists. "Except for the whole not believing in evolution thing.

"Also, all of their protest slogans have Bible verses in them, which we're not exactly 'up' on," said Sherman. "I still don't get that one they do about beholding the behemoth."

"Job 40:15," clarified Warner of the origin of the slogan in question, Behold now behemoth - he came with Noah, and so did woolly mammoth.

"We know behemoth and mammoth don't really rhyme, but let's face it, nothing rhymes with behemoth," he added. "We have that problem all the time with Bible verses at these protests ... Not much rhymes with abomination either."

Presented with the concerns from the two groups, Blue Sky Director of Marketing Sal Merkowicz said they should rest assured there's a logical explanation for including the dinosaurs in the new Ice Age, besides the plans to include their images on T-shirts, jewelry, tote bags, calendars, glowsticks (with lanyard) and other merchandise available at toy stores and fast-food restaurants.

"You'll notice in the movie that it's very clearly explained that the dinosaurs were frozen, or living in a lost underground world, or something like that," he said.

When asked if the film's writers were available to comment, Merkowicz stared blankly for several seconds and then responded, "Um ... I can have another director of marketing talk to you if you want."

Still, the protesters are undeterred. "All we know is, even though these are cartoons we're talking about, we believe they should present the facts accurately," said Dr. Sherman.

"It's true!" added Dr. Warner. "For instance, why not a movie that shows the dinosaurs on the ark with Noah?"

"Um ... Maybe because the tyrannosaurs would have eaten all the other animals, and Noah, and his entire family," responded Dr. Sherman.

"They were babies, and he had them in a wooden cage!" answered Warner, testily, shaking his head and adding simply, "Scientists!" Then they wrestled.

Thrillist
MORE showbiz NEWS
Fake Advertisement


ALL MATERIAL IS SATIRE AND ©2005-2010 BY CRYSTAL AIR PRODUCTIONS