Thursday | March 28, 2024
Chlamydia Named Most Popular STD

PRINCETON, Nj. (CAP) - A new survey conducted at a handful of colleges and universities in New Jersey has found that chlamydia is the most popular sexually-transmitted disease among that age group. Participants chose chlamydia over its closest competitor, gonorrhea, by an overwhelming 2-to-1 margin.

"Umm, I voted for chlamydia because while it hurts, every time I pee, I'm reminded of the awesome time I had getting it," said 19-year-old Kellie James, a sophomore at Rowan University. "And now that I have it, I don't have to worry about getting it again."

The survey asked 2,000 students whether they had any sexually-transmitted diseases, whether they liked what they had, and whether they'd prefer to have a different one. A select group of those surveyed were also offered to try out new STD's as part of a future comparative study.

"For those of us whose sexual heyday was back in the '70s or '80s, it's tough to tell just what's popular with kids these days," said lead researcher Dr. Marjorie Rudyard. "We're happy to report that the STD is indeed alive and well."

While the survey was initially conducted in order to make sure incoming grant money didn't dry up in the next budget, Rudyard said the results have shown that parents who have trouble connecting with their children because of different tastes in music or clothes may have more in common than they realize.

"We won't go so far as to say our survey is bringing families together," said Rudyard. "But when you hear of a son finally tell his dad he itches and dad says he does, too - that really warms the heart."

Rounding out the top five of the most popular STD's among college students are syphilis, crabs, and a little known bacterial infection called donovanosis. Researchers hope this survey becomes the first in an annaul series. The full results of the survey will be published in an upcoming issue of STD Illustrated.

- CAP News Staff

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