REALITY TV

MTV Set To Debut "Real World: Ex-Presidential Candidates"

NEW YORK (CAP) - Further blurring the line between politics and entertainment, programming officials at MTV announced today that the upcoming season of The Real World will feature a cast comprised entirely of this year's former presidential candidates.

"The premise of The Real World has not changed since the first season back in 1992," said Executive Producer Jonathan Murray. "It's seven strangers, picked to live in a house and have their lives taped, to find out what happens when people stop being polite, and start getting real.

"The only difference this time is that the seven strangers are all former candidates for the 2008 presidential race whose campaigns are now defunct," Murray noted.

The cast consists of Mitt Romney, Rudy Giuliani, Fred Thompson, John Edwards, Dennis Kucinich, Bill Richardson, and Joe Biden. The show will chronicle them living in a tricked-out four-bedroom Colonial in downtown Washington D.C. and working together over the next six months.

The first episode will air on the eve of the election in November, and though they've only been in the house a short time, insiders are reporting that things are already spinning out of control.

"One night they were having a raging party," said a sound engineer who spoke to CAP News on the condition of anonymity. "Biden is rocking the turntables, cranking out death metal and gangsta rap, and the other guys are taking turns doing keg stands. All of a sudden, Thompson and Edwards decide it'd be a good idea to strip little Dennis Kucinich naked and throw him in the pool! Everyone was dying laughing.

"Everyone except Dennis, that is, who lost it, screaming If any of you ever touch me again, I'll kill you! Do you hear me? Don't you ever disrespect me like that again! Ever!" the engineer recalled.

MTV Marketing Manager Tim Fields noted that this marks the first time in the history of the show that all seven cast members are male, which apparently rubbed Giuliani the wrong way. According to Fields, Guiliani was overhead complaining that the cast didn't include "at least one slutty party girl that [we] could all take turns banging."

However, Fields said Romney was quick to respond that "at least they didn't stick us with any of those alternative lifestyle guys. If you live with them, there is a pretty high likelihood of them infecting you with the gays."