THE PRESIDENCY

Sure, he may answer that 3am call, but that doesn't mean he has to be happy about it.

Obama Passes 3am Test With Lullaby, Glass Of Water

WASHINGTON (CAP) - President Barack Obama has successfully passed yet another litmus test that was presented to him during the 2008 presidential campaign. This time it was his response to the oft-mentioned '3am wake-up call' that has earned him praise from critics and supporters alike.

"I can confirm that shortly after three o'clock one morning last week, the president was indeed woken up by daughter Sasha who had had a bad dream and was having difficulty getting back to sleep," White House Press Secretary Robert Gibbs told reporters during this morning's briefing.

"Within minutes, not only had President Obama comforted his daughter and explained to her that the dream wasn't real, but he also retrieved her a glass of water, tucked her in, and sang her a quick lullaby," said Gibbs. "All without the need to wake their mother, I might add.

"And believe you me, letting the first lady get a full night of uninterrupted sleep is in all of our best interests, if you catch my drift," Gibbs added.

Secretary of State Hillary Clinton, whose failed presidential campaign created the television ad that asked whether Obama was experienced enough to respond appropriately to that hypothetical 3am wake-up call, said she is "absolutely" satisfied with the president's ability to handle any crisis in the dead of night.

"And I'm not just saying that because I'm on his cabinet," Clinton told George Stephanopolous on his Sunday show This Week. "I can tell you that Chelsea was a friggin' pain in the ass when she was little: covers on, covers off, I don't want this stuffed animal, I want that stuffed animal, where's my sippy.

"Oh, wait, I'm sorry, that was Bill," Hillary noted. "We had our illegal nannies take care of Chelsea, from what I recall."

Despite the successful aversion of this pre-dawn crisis, some vocal Republicans are taking issue with what they call Obama's "single parent" approach. Conservative pundit Rush Limbaugh said the president "has advisors for a reason."

"For the record, what he should have done was call on the joint chiefs," Limbaugh said on his talk show. "We know from half a dozen seasons of 24 that these people can gather at a moment's notice because clearly they do not sleep a wink.

"Ladies and gentlemen, a groggy president is a foggy president and a groggy foggy president is one who gives a glass of water in the middle of the night to an eight-year-old girl with a bladder the size of a walnut," Limbaugh ranted.

Limbaugh then went on to urge a boycott of water, covers, and "government-sponsored lullabies" in order to avoid the inference of being "soft on parenting." He later rescinded the boycott stance and blamed "media childishness" for misunderstanding him.