ARCHIVES: APRIL 2007

Dems Demand Deadline For Sanjaya Withdrawal From Idol

The 51-47 vote was largely along party lines, and fell far short of the two-thirds margin needed to overturn the president's threatened veto.

CAP NEWS SPECIAL

White House doctors confirmed he does need a little time to relax; they said the extra thinking that he's had to do lately has really taken its toll.

ELECTION 2008

According to campaign reports filed with the FEC, Clinton plans to undergo transaxillary surgery next week to increase her breast size from 34B to 36D.

ASTRONOMY

Preliminary plans call for each of Saturn's 31 moons to be auctioned off in early 2008, with the planet itself being demolished in 2009.

HEALTHCARE

Puffing, or pet food huffing, has increased in popularity as the price of other inhalants such as airplane glue and nail polish remover has skyrocketed.

BIG BUSINESS

The acquisition marks the single largest purchase of a planet with inhabitants since 1922, and should be finalized within two months.

INT'L POLITICS

Tony Blair said he let former Iran President Khatami borrow the tools in 1997, but they went unreturned after Khatami left office in 2005.

NUTRITION

Love said she hopes to lose 55 pounds overall, but said she's not sure how well she'll be able to break the drug habit once she loses over 50.

PET CARE

A rash of unexplained virtual pet deaths has led the Food and Drug Administration to announce a recall of almost all Marada and Neopian pet foods.

Caught On Film
Keith Richards appears at an awards show with an unnamed relative, circa 1996.

The best photos from July.

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