ARCHIVES: APRIL 2006

Cheney To Seek Revenge On "Pissant Baseball Fans"

After being booed while throwing out the first pitch, Dick Cheney authorized troops to invade RFK Stadium during the next homestand.

HOLLYWOOD

ABC is telling sponsors that it thinks in 2006 hostage releases will be "in" while hostage taking will be "out".

CELEBRITIES

Witnesses are now coming forward to say Sean Preston actually jumped out of his highchair in a desperate escape attempt.

WAR ON TERROR

"They talk about all the people getting killed in Iraq," a Rumsfeld spokesman said. "But what about all the folks who were simply maimed or crippled?"

WAR ON TERROR

After Condoleeza Rice admitted thousands of errors in the Iraq war, the White House is taking a new tact to try and diffuse the situation.

INT'L POLITICS

President Bush made history yesterday when he signed into law a bill that gives ownership of the country of Mexico to the United States.

IMMIGRATION

Iraqi officials are setting aside the thorny issue of creating a government to deal with a more pressing problem: illegal immigration.

NUTRITION

ViagCola has been a consistent winner in a drug/beverage combo field littered with the likes of the discontinued PaxilPop and RitalinGin.

ECONOMY

The White House hopes these prices will pressure Congress to act on the windshield cleaning proposals the president outlined in his State of the Union address.

Caught On Film
Barry Bonds pauses for a photo op during construction of a $250,000 steroid lab in the basement of his home.

The best photos from July.

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